Saturday, January 1, 2011

The first day of truth

Donna at Write Now, Write Later posted the beginning of a series, Thirty days of Truth, that I enjoyed and decided to do as well. 

Day 1 is something you hate about yourself.

I hate my anxiety and how I look cold and haughty when I feel shy and overwhelmed.

I hate that my chattering is seen as self-absorption, because I want others to chatter back.  Every person's story is interesting to me, not just my own.

I hate that my female friendships have resembled Margaret Atwood's Cat's Eye, and whenever I try to peel back the bandage, I get sliced again.  I wish I had a female best friend.

Above all, I hate feeling so misunderstood while I do everything I can to push others away.

3 comments:

  1. I think this day was a hard one. Kinda left a bad taste in my mouth starting with hate, but maybe that's where we start our self introspection? I find it funny that I have only one female friend and she's nine hours away from me. I wonder if we'd remain best friends if she were here, close? Why? Because I don't get along with women. I think that's an "in person" thing though, because here, in blogland, I've got tons of people I consider friends and I love reading their stories and posts, and dropping by to visit just to learn a little more about them.

    I don't know I find it odd. I know younger women who have TONS of friends, but as we start families, have kids, change jobs or husbands even, those friends seem to drift away and we're left more and more solitary, or maybe it's just less trusting because by the time we've stacked up some years, we've all been hurt by people who were supposed to be our friends. I don't know and I'm rambling, so I'll go now. I'm looking forward to keeping up with you on this!

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  2. Hmm this is really good. I really love the idea of the Thirty Days of Truth. I am just like you in many ways. I really would love following this blog. I can't wait for more from you and if you have some time you may want to check out my blog @ http://dawn-zhang.blogspot.com/. Thank you so much. I am looking up to more from you.

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  3. Stopping by....I follow you.

    Grandma Sez So Blog (est. Nov. 2010)
    (all types of reviews and giveaways blog and I ♥♥♥ critters)
    Do drop in and leave me a much appreciated comment.
    Laurie Harrison
    http://grandma-sez-so.blogspot.com/

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Lend me some sugar!