Monday, June 20, 2011

Catching freedom

“Go small,” whispers Melly, wiggling her finger over her earlobes as if she has magic powers.  Melly melly has a hairy belly.  Melly taps her abdomen and says solemnly, “You too.”  She pulls open her dresser drawer, trying to keep it from rattling along its tracks, and holds still.  She holds her breath, listening, until all she can hear is the blood pounding in her head, clamoring for oxygen.  Whoosh, out comes Melly’s toxins, in goes Melly’s hand, slipping through the jagged crack behind the drawer, rubbing splintered wood.
Are you sleeping are you sleeping Brother John?  Brother John? sings Melly softly as a crinkled photo is transported between her fingers, out of the drawer.  She sets the photo face down on the dresser, and shuts her eyes.  Brother John?  Blindly flipping the photo over, Melly’s eyes snap open, lock click onto the smiling face.  Brother JOHN!

Melly runs, sweat memory tears streaming down her face.  If she runs fast enough, she may be able to shake this stranger out of her (Are you sleeping melly?), be rid of Brother John, who has taken possession of her insides, forever.

* * * * *
I wrote this for this week's Indie Ink challenge.  Random Girl challenged me with: "Every finish line is the beginning of a new race," and I challenged My Eclectic Bookshelf with:  "...loneliness is failed solitude.  We're raising a generation that has grown up with constant connection, and only knows how to be lonely when not connected."  (Sherry Turkle, MIT) 


  1. Yes! This is amazing! I can't believe I'm so excited about something so short...but that is what flash fiction is all about, right? I can't wait to read what you come up with next.

  2. Very eerie! Makes you wonder what exactly is going on...

  3. I agree with Headant... eerie... but I dig it... =)

    Also, just wanted to compliment you on your layout. You have great taste.

  4. Wow! Nicely written...I love the little rhymes that both interrupt and flow with the natural energy of the piece. I wonder about what exactly she's running from...the ritual with the picture, the holding of her breath...her entire preface to the run adds to the air of mystery in the story.

  5. I'm loving the eerie stories I am reading this week. Why have I not done this before?

  6. Wow, this gave me anxiety to read it... I don't like when there is frantic tones from one so young, makes me think of bad things happening but this piece is perfectly written and I'm glad you got my prompt and killed it!


Lend me some sugar!