Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Taste the (OCD) rainbow

BUCCELLATION (noun): The act of dividing into small morsels.

 
My sister and I couldn’t look away, despite an increasing urge to vomit.  A pleasant lunch had veered into horror movie territory in our schoolgirl minds. Paralyzed with shock, we watched in silent disgust as our three-year old brother plunged his slice of apple pie into the bowl of chicken noodle soup, before grabbing at the soggy mess with chubby hands and smearing it across his face. A small amount of the abomination made it into his mouth, eliciting a chortle of delight. The noise snapped me into action. “MOM!” I yelled. “Tyler’s doing it again!”
This is the earliest memory I have of the wrongness that is Mixing Food Together, a dinner table scourge also known as the casserole. No. That’s not how you do it. Let’s all remain calm and eat our food in an orderly fashion, vegetables first.  This applies to snacks too. No one wants to see you throwing a handful of Skittles or M&M’s into your mouth all willy-nilly.
It’s OK; maybe you weren’t taught the right way to eat candy. I’ll show you:

1)  First, dump all the Skittles out of the bag (let’s not kid ourselves – you are going to eat the whole bag at once).
what a mess!

2)  Organize the Skittles into their colour groups.

3)  Put the colour groups in order. Be reasonable and try to follow an actual rainbow/the colour wheel. What’s red doing next to green? This isn’t Christmas, friends. Pull yourselves together.


At this point you do have the option to remove a colour group you aren’t comfortable with. For example, my friend Andrea has an aversion to blue candy, because “blue isn’t a real colour.” Apparently the sky and blueberries don’t count.

4)  Arrange the Skittles within their colour groups into two lines (bonus points if you turn them so they all have the "S" facing up). Eat the stray Skittles until you have an even number in each colour group.

5)  Starting with the largest colour group, eat the Skittles until you have the same amount as in another colour group. Then alternate until you reach the same amount as in the next group. Add that group in.

6)  Lick your lips. Isn’t buccellation fun?

32 comments:

  1. Seriously? I am hoping that my laughing was appropriate, although you could be OCD. Either way, I laughed at the pie in the soup too. Great word for B.

    Rhonda @Laugh-Quotes.com
    AtoZ #42

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    1. I'm not OCD, just Type A. We get a little obsessive compulsive too.

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    1. Haha! A moment of craziness - you can decide whether that was the apple noodle soup or the Skittles arrangement.

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  3. I liked this very much. I would be a total nightmare for you to have as a dinner guest though because I'd mix everything together and probably make you cry (unintentionally - things just taste better like that!)

    (Grover at Inane Ramblings)

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    1. Just thinking about it freaks me out!

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  4. I love this, I actually used to do this with sweets when I was younger. I also cut up all of the food on my plate before I start eating, but this is just laziness so I don't need to hold my knife while I eat!

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    1. This really made me laugh - I'm way too impatient to cut up everything before I eat. So funny!

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  5. Haha! I, too, am an organized eater. Maybe not quite to this extent, but I eat my Skittles in order, two at a time, always the same two colors together, in order from least liked to most liked. Gotta have a flavor you like to end on!
    I do the same with meals. Least liked part of the meal to most liked. And rarely to I combine two things on one forkful.
    Great B word!

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    1. I don't know...that sounds pretty organized to me. I'm impressed.

      I eat least liked to most liked too. I like to savour the anticipation as long as possible.

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  6. Eating skittles in order? I couldn't agree more! I'm a new follower too...

    www.diaryofasquaretoothedgirl.blogspot.com

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  7. "let’s not kid ourselves – you are going to eat the whole bag at once)."
    Every time. :D

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  8. You know those chocolate-covered marshmallow eggs that come in egg cartons and are only available at Easter? Yeah, there's a right way to eat those, too! :-D

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    1. Mmm, I love those! YUM. I'm curious how they should be eaten though. Enlighten me?

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  9. As someone who is actually, clinically OCD (and proud of it! - Makes me a ROCKIN' Exec Assistant!!) let me tell you how I eat skittles - it's a little different but it is equally anal retentive & type A :):
    -Open package
    -Spill out pile of skittles
    -sort by color
    -eat by number - most to least
    -if there are two piles that have the same number of skittles tie goes to rainbow order.
    **This method also works with M&M's!!**

    Also: So glad I am not alone in this!

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    1. I'm glad you enjoyed this! After I posted it I wondered if anyone with OCD would be offended. Usually I just make fun of my own mental health issues (depression and anxiety), not other people's. I completely agree with you on the job benefits - being Type A and detail-oriented has been a very good thing in my job. No one wants an accountant who says, "Yeah, we're only off a few million dollars; no big deal."

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  10. Okay, so I do eat my skittles and m&m's like that. Now I'm a little worried. And I never mix foods together on my plate.

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    1. I think it's more common than you might think - no need to worry. Not mixing food together is just basic tastebud hygiene!

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  11. To this day I still keep my food separate and eat one thing at a time - I'm in my mid-30s. My girls do it too. Although I will eat casserole and other "mixed" foods happily, if there is a choice and a chance, I practice food segregation!!

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    1. I've grown to enjoy certain casseroles, but I often think I'd enjoy the ingredients more if they were separated.

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  12. you get a comment for having the most surreal post I have read so far;-)
    thanks for sharing

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    1. Yes! Winning the weirdness Olympics!

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  13. Great post, just stopping by as a fellow AtoZ Challenger.

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  14. Ha! I have a method for eating Milky Ways, but it wouldn't make for photos as beautiful as these of your Skittles.

    Bon appetit!

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    1. Now I'm curious about this method - care to share?

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  15. Hahaha, I would be one who just throws a handful of skittles in at the same time, regardless of colour. I do try not to mix types of sweets though.

    I mix other things, like dark chocolate and wine. Yum!

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    1. You know what is really good though? Squish a chocolate chip into a Swedish berry and eat them together. So good.

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  16. Well the only time we bother to sort them is when we are playing minute to win it during the meals we serve to the homeless. Generally its a bag of mm's that have to be sorted into cups. The homeless folks love the chance to do something fun and to have a chance to win a back pack or even fresh socks. But for general candy eating I never sort them.

    Enjoyed your post.

    Margot at A Devotional Mosaic and Spark My Creativity

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    1. I take any chance I get to sort candy. It soothes me.

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Lend me some sugar!